The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast

• Episode 318: The Messy Truth About Healing with Kerry McAvoy, Ph.D

  Dr. Kerry McAvoy returns to talk about what it means to heal from narcissistic abuse. Not just from an intellectual standpoint, but healing your nervous system, in your relationships, and in your relationship to yourself. Healing is not quick, it’s not tidy, and it’s definitely not linear. Dr. Kerry and I talk about how women have been conditioned to serve, to disappear, to manage the emotions of everyone around us just to maintain the illusion of peace. We explore what emotional fusion looks like, what healthy relationships look like, and what it means to reconnect with Self throughout your healing journey. Here’s what else we get into, in this episode: How and why so many of us learned to believe our needs are “too much” (3:59) Discerning between, “Are you being loved and respected or just useful?” (18:03) What healthy love actually looks like (spoiler alert it includes messiness and mistakes) (28:04) Healing doesn’t have a finish line and why that’s okay (29:35) Learn more about Kerry McAvoy, Ph.D:  Dr. Kerry, a retired psychologist and author, is an expert on cultivating healthy relationships and deconstructing narcissism. Her blogs have been featured in Mamami, YourTango, Scary Mommy, and The Good Men Project. In Love You More, Dr. McAvoy gives an uncensored glimpse into her survival of narcissistic abuse, and her workbook, First Steps to Leaving a Narcissist, helps victims break free from the confusion common in abusive relationships. She hosts the Breaking Free from Narcissistic Abuse podcast and offers trauma-related advice on social media. Resources & Links: Thank you to today’s podcast sponsor: Our Family WizardUnbreakable – the Divorce Recovery Retreat, Sedona, AZ in April 2025Submit your questions here for possible inclusion in future Q&A podcast episodes Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective Dr. Kerry’s websiteDr. Kerry on Facebook  Dr. Kerry on Instagram Dr. Kerry on YouTube Dr. Kerry on TikTok Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships, David Schnarch PhD| ====== DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM.

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• Episode 317: Burned Haystack Dating Method with Jennie Young

  Finding a partner after divorce can feel like searching for a needle in a haystack. This week’s guest, Jennie Young, suggests a bold alternative - burn the haystack. Jennie is the creator of Burned Haystack Dating Method, a method grounded in applied rhetoric and feminist praxis, designed to push back against the toxic norms built into many modern dating platforms. In this episode, Jennie shares practical, no-nonsense strategies for using dating apps more intentionally, treating them as tools (not lifelines), turning off notifications, and yes, burning the haystack. We also explore the common rhetorical patterns many men use on apps and how to recognize and respond to them when they show up. Tune in for an eye-opening conversation that puts you back in control of your dating life, no algorithm required. Here’s what else we get into, in this episode: How Burned Haystack Dating Method came to be and the story behind its name (5:22) The 10 essential rules that make up the Burned Haystack Dating Method (13:06) What critical discourse analysis actually is and how it can help you navigate dating apps with confidence (37:10) The rhetorical red flags to look out for, like “Test and apologize,” “Are you my mother?” and “Where were you on January 6th?” (38:58) Learn more about Jennie Young:  Jennie Young is the creator of Burned Haystack Dating Method, a dating method grounded in applied rhetoric and feminist praxis. It is designed to combat many of the challenges of dating in a market that is too frequently mediated by misogynistic and patriarchal structures. She holds a Ph.D. in rhetoric and discourse studies from Case Western Reserve University and a satire writing certificate from Second City Chicago. Her work has been published in McSweeney’s, Ms. Magazine, HuffPost, and others and covered by major media outlets such as The New York Times, Newsweek, RollingStone, and others. Resources & Links: Thank you to this episode's sponsor: Wild Pastures Unbreakable – the Divorce Recovery Retreat, Sedona, AZ in April 2025 Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective Jennie’s website Jennie’s Facebook Group Jennie on Instagram Jennie on Bluesky Jennie on LinkedIn Episode 309: Online Dating After Divorce with Alyssa Dineen DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM. Episode Link: https://kateanthony.com/podcast/episode-317-burned-haystack-dating-method-with-jennie-young/

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• Episode 316: Running The Numbers with Nikki Tucker

  Nikki Tucker is back, and we’re tackling some of the most infuriating, and increasingly common, financial issues women are facing in divorce today. Nikki and I are arming you with strategies to fight back during divorce negotiations with facts and numbers. In this episode, we talk about how fear can make you want to just give in, and why that urge to "just be done" could cost you so much more than you realize. Nikki’s advice? Run the numbers. Know the math behind the “yes” and the “no.”  Plus, we touch on something a lot of us don’t want to think about, but need to: the unstable and uncertain economy. Nikki offers practical steps you can take now to protect yourself financially.  This episode is packed with straightforward insights and empowering advice to help you make confident money decisions today that will shape your future. Here’s what else we get into, in this episode: How to push back on unreasonable settlement offers by fighting fear with facts (5:58) What the unstable economy means for your post-divorce financial decisions (20:30) Crypto in divorce: when it’s worth fighting over and when it’s just a shiny distraction (28:49) Learn more about Nikki Tucker:  Nikki Tucker is a Speaker, Certified Divorce Financial Analyst, and Founder of The FIIRM Approach, a business dedicated to helping women overcome uncertainty and overwhelm in their financial lives while preparing for uncoupling or divorce. Through dynamic action-based workshops and on-demand digital resources, Nikki makes financial education practical and accessible to all women, showing them how to take control of their money, and create a new financial life post-divorce. Nikki firmly believes that all women deserve financial security, and is committed to reframing the divorce journey for women by reducing stigma and fear, and allowing them to establish and maintain financial independence, regardless of their relationship status. Resources & Links: Unbreakable – the Divorce Recovery Retreat, Sedona, AZ in April 2025 Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective Nikki’s website Nikki on Instagram Nikki on Facebook The Divorce Support Pack DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM. Episode link:  https://kateanthony.com/podcast/episode-316-running-the-numbers-with-nikki-tucker/

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• Episode 315: Your Next Brave Journey with Dawn Pick Benson

  Dawn Pick Benson, a self-discovery travel coach and writer, joins me to explore how travel can be a powerful tool for transformation, especially during life’s crossroads, whether it’s divorce, a faith shift, or an identity crisis.  When everything feels uncertain, moving forward can seem impossible. Dawn shares how travel became a catalyst for reclaiming her power, redefining her faith, and embracing a new identity. Her journey to Kosovo reveals how travel isn’t just an escape, it can be a path to deep spiritual reshaping and self-discovery. What you’ll hear: The pivotal moment when Dawn realized her marriage and faith no longer aligned with her true self (2:36) How travel allowed her to question and redefine her beliefs outside of societal expectations (11:49) Practical tips to make travel more affordable, even if you feel stuck financially or logistically (29:08) How the BRAVE Journey process helps women design meaningful solo travel experiences (32:09) The role of community and self-reflection in making travel a transformational experience (39:16) Learn more about Dawn Pick Benson: Dawn Pick Benson is a self-discovery travel coach and writer who helps women rediscover themselves and thrive in their second half of life through travel. Dawn’s small group coaching program, Brave Journey, helps women envision, plan and take their own transformational journeys. She also hosts retreats for women each year around the world. Dawn has visited more than 50 countries and has lived and worked in the Middle East and Eastern Europe. She’s a Global Ambassador for the Travel Coach Network, a Certified Cultural Intelligence facilitator, and her work and story has appeared in The Washington Post, The New York Times, Wander and TripAdvisor. Dawn splits her time between living in the U.S. & Kosovo, where she is currently working on a book about her own journey and the transformative power of solo travel after divorce. Resources & Links:Unbreakable – the Divorce Recovery Retreat, Sedona, AZ in April 2025Submit your questions here for possible inclusion in future Q&A podcast episodes Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate  Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective Dawn’s websiteDawn on Instagram Dawn’s Substack Dawn on LinkedIn Dawn on Facebook  Dawn on YouTube DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM. Episode link: https://kateanthony.com/podcast/episode-315-your-next-brave-journey-with-dawn-pick-benson/

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• Episode 314: Streamlining Divorce with Liz Pharo, Founder of Divorce.com

  What if divorce didn’t have to be as complicated or expensive? Liz Pharo, the founder of Divorce.com, is on a mission to make the divorce process easier and less stressful. In this episode, Liz shares how she transitioned from the tech world to create Divorce.com, a platform designed to help people handle the paperwork, planning, and even mediation in a more streamlined way. Liz and I talk about the different types of divorce, mediated vs. court-based, and why focusing on the kids and minimizing trauma is key. Plus, Liz shares how Divorce.com can save you time and money, the importance of working with coaches and therapists during the process, and why you need to be aware of sketchy divorce service providers. Divorce is never simple, but with the right resources and mindset, it doesn’t have to be confusing or exhausting. What you’ll hear: Liz’s journey from software engineer to Divorce.com founder (2:56) How Divorce.com simplifies the divorce process (7:57) The benefits of mediation and working with professionals (10:30) Why being informed about divorce options is crucial (26:12) Learn more about Liz Pharo:  Elizabeth "Liz" Pharo launched Divorce.com in 2022 with the vision of revolutionizing the way people divorce – offering a more compassionate and healthier path with less conflict and financial burden. Amid her own divorce, Liz founded Divorce.com to pave the way for individuals to access online divorce services at a fraction of the cost, as well as eliminate the taboo that still remains around divorce. The company's goal is to have couples planning to divorce first consider “Divorce.com-ing it.” Mediators then guide couples through the Divorce.com process to complete their divorce peacefully with mutual respect for both parties. Beyond her work helping Divorce.com reduce the time, cost, and trauma of the typical divorce process, Liz is dedicated to the growth and development of her own community and serves on the boards of the Economic Development Partnership of Alabama, Venture for America, and Blight-Free Birmingham. Liz enjoys running and spending time with her family at Lake Martin. Resources & Links: Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective Unbreakable – the Divorce Recovery Retreat, Sedona, AZ in April 2025 Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate Divorce.comDivorce.com on Instagram Divorce.com on LinkedIn Divorce.com on TikTok Divorce.com on Facebook Divorce.com on YouTube Liz on LinkedIn Liz on Instagram Episode Link:     https://kateanthony.com/podcast/episode-314-streamlining-divorce-with-liz-pharo-founder-of-divorce-com/

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