If Putting Yourself First Feels Wrong, Listen To This!
You’ve spent your whole life making sure everyone else is okay—but what about you?
This episode is for the women who are exhausted, overextended, and quietly wondering when it’ll finally be their turn. Hilary is breaking down the deep conditioning that taught us to believe being selfless equals being worthy, and why that’s total BS.
If you’ve ever felt guilty for wanting more, for needing space, or simply saying no… this one’s going to hit. Because the truth is, no one is going to magically give you permission to rest, breathe, or be a priority. You have to choose it. And when you do? Everything changes.
Episode Highlights:
Why self-sacrifice won’t earn you the love or respect you deserve
The hard truth about how you’re teaching people to treat you
The 3 steps to stop people-pleasing and start living for you
How to be self-centered (in the best possible way)
And why this shift is your ticket to freedom
Episode Breakdown:
[00:00] How You Were Conditioned to Be Selfless
[01:32] Why You Feel Undervalued and Exhausted
[02:03] The Guilt of Prioritizing Yourself
[03:06] The Truth About Self-Sacrifice
[04:00] Setting Boundaries: Teaching Others How to Treat You
[05:04] What It Means to Be Self-Centered
[05:57] 3 Steps to Start Prioritizing Yourself
[07:01] What to Expect When You Start Saying No
[07:22] Why You Need to Choose Yourself Now
[07:54] Start Living for You
Nobody’s coming to save you. It’s your turn—right now.
Tune in, then grab Hilary’s free video training This Changes Everything to start making yourself a daily priority without apology. You’ll never look back.
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8:48
Why Successful Women Feel Empty (Here’s What to do)
She’s successful, impressive, accomplished… and secretly miserable.
If that hits a little too close to home, this episode is for you.
Hilary is calling out the high-achieving hamster wheel that so many women are stuck on—working their asses off, racking up accolades, and still feeling like something’s missing. Sound familiar? That’s because you’ve been chasing a version of success that was never meant to satisfy you, just the people clapping from the sidelines.
In this episode, Hilary breaks down the real reason success isn’t scratching the itch—and why being self-centered (yes, self-centered) is the antidote. Not the selfish kind. The sane, grounded, peaceful, fulfilled kind.
Episode Highlights:
The lie high-achieving women are sold (and why it keeps you stuck)
How to recognize when you’re chasing validation instead of real joy
The myth of “I'll be happy when...” and how to break it
3 real steps to start living life on your terms—today
Episode Breakdown:
[00:00] Why High-Achieving Women Still Feel Empty
[02:06] How to Break the Burnout Cycle
[03:54] Two Choices: Keep Performing or Prioritize Yourself
[04:15] What Self-Centered Really Means
[05:30] Step 1: Audit Your Life
[06:24] Step 2: Redefine Success for You
[06:55] Step 3: Start Making Self-Centered Decisions
[07:37] Why People Might Not Like the New You (and That’s Fine)
[08:09] Choose to be happy, NOW.
If you're tired of being exhausted, overextended, and secretly questioning if this is all there is—Hilary’s here to say: hell no, it’s not. It’s time to stop chasing and start choosing you.
Because you’re not too much. You’ve just been aiming at the wrong finish line.
Hit play. It’s time for a self-centered glow-up.
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8:38
5 Signs You’re Entering Your Wise Woman Era
Let’s get one thing straight: aging isn’t something to fear—it’s when the real magic begins. In this unapologetically honest episode, Hilary drops the five signs that you’re officially stepping into your Wise Woman Era—where your confidence is unshakable, your boundaries are bulletproof, and your “no” comes with zero explanation.
After 25 years working inside the minds of ambitious, accomplished, but still unfulfilled women, Hilary’s here to tell you: the glow-up you’re craving doesn’t come from the outside. It comes when you stop shrinking, apologizing, and people-pleasing—and start trusting, honoring, and liking yourself. Wild concept, right?
Episode Highlights:
Why confidence that depends on applause is fake confidence
The quiet power of making your time, peace, and energy non-negotiable
How to stop apologizing for existing (seriously, stop it)
What happens when you finally stop waging war with your reflection
The surprising key to becoming unshakably magnetic
Episode Breakdown:
[00:00] The Wise Woman Era
[00:44] Sign 1: Shifting Confidence from External to Internal
[02:10] Sign 2: No Longer Negotiating Your Time, Peace, or Power
[05:09] Sign 3: Stopping Apologies for Taking Up Space
[06:02] Sign 4: Embracing Your Appearance and Energy
[08:00] Sign 5: Developing a Loving Relationship with Yourself
[09:46] The Power of Being Self-Centered
[10:28] What Will You Do Differently?
This isn’t about becoming someone new—it’s about returning to who you were before the world told you to be polite, quiet, small, and nice.
So let’s burn the rulebook, reclaim your place at the center of your life, and make “wise” the new sexy.
👉 Ready to stop performing and start leading? Hit play. Your era has arrived.
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10:56
If You’re The Fixer, Helper Problem-Solver Type, Please Listen
Are you the fixer? The one who always steps up, saves the day, and keeps everything running smoothly? Yeah, that might sound noble, but here’s the truth—you’re not helping. You’re enabling.
Hilary is here to break down why over-functioning is actually a trap—for you and everyone around you. You think you’re keeping things together, but what you’re really doing is creating dependence, burning yourself out, and blocking others from stepping up. And let’s be real—you kind of love being the one everyone relies on, don’t you? 👀
Episode Highlights:
Why “helping” is keeping everyone stuck (including you)
How over-functioning leads to exhaustion, resentment, and crappy relationships
The sneaky reason you can’t stop fixing everything
How to back off without guilt and let people handle their own mess
The magic of actually receiving for once (yes, you deserve it)
Episode Breakdown:
00:00 Are You Over-Functioning?
02:00 Five Reasons Over-Functioning is Bad
02:32 Reason 1: Training People to Rely on You
03:24 Reason 2: Robbing Others of Their Wins and Lessons
05:08 Reason 3: Getting Something Out of It
08:08 Reason 4: Hogging the Joy of Giving
09:53 Reason 5: Blocking the Flow of Reciprocity
12:22 The Hard Truth & Simple Fix
It’s time to drop the superhero cape and let people solve their own damn problems. Because the less you do, the more you actually get.
🎧 Listen now & start unburdening yourself!
💫 Subscribe to Hilary’s YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@HilarySilver?sub_confirmation=1
🔥 Grab my FREE training, This Changes Everything: https://hilarysilver.com/guides/
👉 Follow Hilary on Instagram: @iamhilarysilver
💬 Which one is harder for you—saying “no” or asking for help? Spill in the comments!
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14:12
How to Start Over and Succeed: 6 Powerful Lessons
Starting over? Again?! If the thought of making a major life change sends you spiraling, it’s time for a reality check—starting fresh isn’t scary, staying stuck is.
Hilary shares the six biggest lessons she’s learned from reinventing herself—multiple times. She’s built and walked away from thriving businesses, started fresh, failed fast, and bet on herself—again and again. And now? She’s giving you the real talk on what it actually takes to start over (and make sure it pays off).
Episode Highlights:
Get clear on what you actually want (spoiler: most people aren’t).
Why being half in, half out is a guaranteed way to stay stuck
Failure isn’t a thing. Not trying? That’s the real failure.
Why betting on yourself is the safest investment you’ll ever make
Episode Breakdown:
[00:00] Why Starting Over Feels So Hard
[03:52] The #1 Mistake People Make When Reinventing Themselves
[05:06] How to Fully Commit to Your Next Move
[07:04] The Power of Mindset
[09:55] Burnout, Fear & the Power of Letting Go
[12:13] Redefining Failure: What You’ve Been Getting Wrong
[14:08] Betting on Yourself is the Secret to Lasting Success
[16:14] Starting Over (Again) & Why It’s Worth It
[19:25] You Have Nothing to Lose
💥 Ready to bet on yourself? Hit play.
💫 Subscribe to Hilary's YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@HilarySilver?sub_confirmation=1
🔥 Grab Hilary’s FREE training, This Changes Everything (and other free resources!): https://hilarysilver.com/guides/
👉 Follow Hilary on Instagram: @iamhilarysilver
🚀 What’s your biggest reinvention lesson? Drop it in the comments!
Welcome to the podcast that’s here to flip your world—and your mindset—upside down.
This is The Hilary Silver Podcast, where being self-centered isn’t selfish—it’s the cheat code to getting everything you want in life. Because when YOU are good, everything else falls into place. Your relationships, your confidence, your success, your body, your peace—they all start with you.
So, if you’ve been running yourself ragged trying to be everything for everyone and still wondering why you feel like crap, buckle up. It’s time to step into the role of the main character in your own life.
Hilary’s the straight-talking, script-flipping, former psychotherapist you didn’t know you needed—part brain science, part universal laws, and 100% no bullshit. She’s your bestie with receipts, here to help you stop waiting for permission, start trusting yourself, and finally build a life that feels as good as it looks.
Every week, Hilary dives into the real stuff—confidence, boundaries, aging, relationships, success—all the things that actually matter, without the fluff (or the toxic positivity). Just real talk, hard truths, and tools that work, served up with little spoonfuls of sweetness to help the medicine go down.
New episodes drop every Friday on all podcast platforms and YouTube.
Hit follow, tune in, and let’s make self-centered the best thing that’s ever happened to you.
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