For the last two decades, I've worked closely with infants, toddlers, preschoolers and their parents—listening, guiding and supporting families and their young ...
In this episode, I sit down with one of the most respected experts in early childhood, Tovah Klein. I’ve admired Tovah since I first read How Toddlers Thrive at the start of my career, and I’ve had the privilege of knowing her firsthand over the years. Now, with her latest book, Raising Resilience, I knew I had to have her on to discuss a topic that has been central to both my work and my parenting: resilience.
While I’ve studied and shared insights about resilience for years, I still struggle to find the right balance between supporting my children and preparing them for the real world. In this conversation, I get to turn the tables and ask Tovah for guidance in my own parenting—particularly with my older daughter. We dive into real-life challenges, from handling friendship rejection to navigating morning routines, and explore how to build the kind of parent-child relationship that encourages openness rather than secrecy as kids grow.
What I Took Away From This Episode:
Resilience isn’t something we can instill with a quick tip or hack—it’s built through authentic relationships.
If we feel like we’re doing too much for our kids, we probably are.
The kids who always seem “good” may be the ones we need to check in on the most.
Trusting our kids to come to us—rather than constantly rescuing them—is key.
Parenting isn’t just about our kids; it’s also about understanding what we bring to the relationship—our own fears, projections, and patterns. (Which, at its core, is what this podcast is all about!)
This might be my favorite episode yet—I haven’t stopped thinking about it since we recorded. Tovah is the mentor and expert we all wish we could have coffee with. I feel lucky I got to sip my Culture Pop soda with her while soaking in her wisdom.
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4: Sore Loser Energy, Triggers and Growing Through Discomfort with My Husband Matty Mo
In this episode, I sat down (okay, maybe dragged) my husband, Matt Monness—aka Matty Mo—to chat about the things in our kids that remind us of ourselves, and where those traits might come from. Unlike me, Matt isn’t exactly a talker when it comes to himself, so this episode is short but full of "gems."
Here’s what we uncovered:
Matt doesn’t like losing—and he’s here to remind us that being competitive isn’t a bad thing, as long as it doesn’t come at the expense of good sportsmanship.
Letting our kids lose sometimes, instead of "head starts" can help them in their long future of not always being the "winner."
The things that trigger us most in our kids often reflect parts of ourselves, even if we’re not aware of it.
Connecting the dots between our struggles and their roots isn’t always easy, but it’s a chance to learn and grow (yes, even Matt agrees).
Self-reflection isn’t necessarily fun—at least not for Matt—but it’s an opportunity worth taking.
Takeaway: While Matt insists he’s never doing this again, he’s officially opened the door for more Dads on the show. What did you think of this episode? Should we bring on more Dads?
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3: Discussing Bodies, Boundaries and Bedtimes with My Close Mom Friend
This was the very first episode I recorded!
In this episode, I sit down with my friend Blake Dembling, a close mom friend, to tackle the topics that many of us find daunting—or even cringe-worthy—when it comes to discussing them with our kids. Blake and I each have two daughters around the same age, and she’s one of the few people I know who can talk openly and honestly about everything. That’s why I invited her to join me for this conversation.
We dive into setting boundaries around nudity in the home—when is it time to stop showering or bathing with our kids? How do we approach those conversations in a way that respects their curiosity without shaming them? We also touch on the big, inevitable questions like: What is sex? What is a period? Who is God? Along the way, we reflect on our own childhoods and how those experiences shape the way we parent today.
Blake shares her struggles with her daughter’s bedtime challenges, and we unpack the guilt that often comes with not always being able to give our kids the attention we know they need in the moment. We also talk about those parenting spirals—when our kids’ behavior or reactions (think: school photos or performances) don’t match what we had hoped—and how to differentiate between being “slow to warm” and “difficult.”
This episode is a candid, heartfelt conversation about navigating the complexities of parenting with grace and honesty, while giving ourselves permission to not have all the answers.
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2: Rethinking Expectations, Extracurricular Resistance, Talking About Death and Hiring a Caregiver with Neeti Narula.
In this episode, I sit down with Neeti Narula, a yoga and meditation teacher and creator at Melissa Wood Health. Neeti is also a mom to son Lokan (5) and daughter Rooni (2).
Together, we explore the common struggles parents face when their expectations for their children clash with where their kids are emotionally or developmentally—especially around topics like separation and trying new things. For example, how do we respond when we’re eager to see our child join friends in an activity, but they resist? When do we honor their hesitation, and when is it helpful to encourage them to push through? What’s really behind our own triggers in these moments?
We also dive into the sensitive topic of talking to our kids about death and personal loss, sharing thoughts on how to approach difficult conversations without feeling the pressure to have all the answers.
We end the episode with Neeti seeking guidance on what to consider when hiring a caregiver for her children.
Key Takeaways:
When we understand our own discomfort around our children’s readiness, we become better equipped to support them through challenges rather than simply pushing them forward.
It’s often less about the activity itself and more about giving our kids opportunities for growth and exploration.
Sometimes, our default mode is to rush—but leaning into natural consequences, like the simple experience of being late, can be a more effective motivator than we realize.
Talking about death often feels scarier for us than for our kids. We don’t need perfect answers; it’s okay to say, “I’m not ready to talk about that yet.”
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39:52
1: Getting Stuck on the "Little Things" and Raising a "Slow to Warm Up" Child with Neha Ruch
In this episode I sit down with Neha Ruch, the founder of Mother Untitled, the first platform dedicated to discussing women taking career pauses and leaning into family life.
Neha has two kids: Lyla, age 6 and Bodie age 9.Â
Neha and I talk about getting stuck on the "little things" that don’t feel so little in the moment—like when our kids insist on wearing certain clothing—and how we can project our own feelings around their self expression. For example, the thought “People will judge me as a parent if my child wears this again!” We also discuss how our kids' expressions of discomfort, such as not wanting attention on their birthdays, can get under our skin. Lastly, we explore the experience of raising "slow-to-warm" kids.Â
What we learned in this episode:
Our children’s assertiveness can be empowering when we move past our own hang-ups.Â
Honoring who our kids are—especially when they express such a clear sense of self—is challenging but crucial.
There’s a real difference between shaming/guilting a child and helping them become more aware of others.Â
Our kids' behavior does not define our success as parents—we have to trust the long game.Â
When we’re so fixated on “fixing" our child, we miss the opportunity for our own personal growth.Â
Neha’s book, The Power Pause, is a guide to career breaks after having kids, rebranding stay-at-home parenthood for a new generation of women and families. The Power Pause comes out January 14th, 2025.
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For the last two decades, I've worked closely with infants, toddlers, preschoolers and their parents—listening, guiding and supporting families and their young children. I've connected with so many parents through my social media account, texts, calls, and leading moms' groups. When we have open, honest and vulnerable conversations—no matter who you are as a parent—that's how we connect, learn and grow.
We also discover so much about ourselves and how that plays into our parenting. That's why I created We Didn't Turn Out Ok—a podcast where you'll hear real conversations about challenges we face in parenting, hear how we uncover the roadblocks, often from our own stuff, and listen to how we work through what's often keeping us stuck. There will be professionals in the field, noteworthy guests and everyone in between.
Using my own parenting journey and approach—combined with research-backed best practices—I am determined to help us all move forward from our areas of where we "didn't turn out ok." Every guest will be sharing openly and honestly knowing that it will help them grow as a parent but will also help all of you listening.
Welcome to We Didn't Turn Out Ok.
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