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A soon-to-be 40-year-old wants to face his fear of skydiving and use it to teach his anxious five-year-old that fear is normal but it doesn't get to run your life. I break down the difference between gambling and accepting calculated risk, what to actually look for in a drop zone, and why pushing yourself smartly and incrementally beats trying to be a badass for an audience that isn't watching.
A guy who grew up homeless and couch-surfing wrote in about feeling like he came back from a war he never fought. We talk about why trauma isn't owned by anyone, why your past doesn't have to be your identity, and why if the community you need doesn't exist yet, you might be the one who has to build it.
Last question is about discipline. A husband, father, and plant manager who used to run ultras can't find the hours anymore and wonders if he's lost it. He hasn't. His life changed. The goalpost has to move with it.
Plus the book hit the Times again, and I'm headed to Virginia Beach.
Enjoy
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Alan Mack flew Chinooks for the 160th Special Operations Aviation Regiment for seventeen years. Chief Warrant Officer 5. Senior MH-47 pilot. Flight lead. Instructor. He was the pilot in command of Razor 03 on Takur Ghar — the aircraft shot up trying to insert a SEAL element on top of the mountain that became Roberts Ridge. He has logged over 6,700 flight hours, took rounds through his cockpit on Anaconda, ran fog approaches into walled compounds in Iraq, and helped write the procedures the Night Stalkers still use to land in zero visibility. After retiring, he commanded the flight detachment at West Point and spent a decade running emergency management for a New York county. He is the author of Razor 03 and the upcoming Chinooks in the Dark.
We cover the new Medal of Honor awarded to a 160th pilot and what it actually takes to earn one. The Anaconda shoot down — RPG, lost hydraulics, three cans of fluid, and a crew chief pumping a t-handle to keep him in the controls. Why he chose to dive at a Dishka instead of climbing. The myth around Extortion 17 and why the conspiracy doesn't hold up. How the unit trains pilots to fly through real lead. Air refueling at night in the weather. Cutting hoses with rotor blades. And the lessons every pilot — military or civilian — needs to internalize before the aircraft starts shedding systems on them.
Enjoy
Chinooks in the Dark: https://a.co/d/0cOy6d88
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Michael and I get into it on this one. Hantavirus headlines, the Doomsday Clock, wind turbines, the Epstein note, and a guy on YouTube paying his bills by getting stung by bugs.
I open by confidently passing along bad medical advice from two articles I read. Michael fact-checks me in real time. We agree it's a good exercise in why you should slow down before you repeat anything. From there we get into what Hantavirus actually is, why this isn't going to be another lockdown, and why I think people would push back hard if it were.
The Doomsday Clock is at 89 seconds. Not 90. Not 88. Two old guys in suits decided. We talk about why fear-mongering on a quarter clock face stops working at some point, and what's actually happening with all those wind turbines I just flew past for eleven hours that weren't spinning.
Then the heavier stuff. The "rape academy" story. Epstein's suicide note. Andrew Mountbottom. Why I don't believe anyone in his orbit is ever going to face accountability in this country, and what that says about a government willing to look away if the math works out for them.
Enjoy
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John Kiriakou spent 14 years at the CIA. He started as an analyst, went operational, and eventually ran counterterrorism work in Pakistan that led to the capture of Abu Zubaydah. He was the first U.S. government official to publicly confirm that the agency was waterboarding prisoners. For that, the Obama administration prosecuted him under the Intelligence Identities Protection Act and sent him to federal prison for 23 months. He lost his pension. He lost his career. Most of his kids stopped speaking to him. Today he writes books, hosts a podcast, and teaches a course on the history of terrorism.
We get into how the agency really works. Recruiting spies. Breaking into a house in a foreign country to plant a bug. The mentor who told him to walk up to a target's front door and sell him out to his face. Then we get into the part nobody at Langley wants to talk about. Torture. Rendition. The innocent people who got grabbed off planes and buses and never got their lives back.
We also cover Section 702, the Patriot Act, Iran, Iraq, and why no agency ever gives the power back. 
Enjoy.
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Four questions this week. The kind that don't have clean answers.
A guy whose father murdered his mother is asking how to get back to who he was before. He's not.
A 28-year-old still living at home is watching his mom's cancer come back and trying to figure out how to spend the time he has left.
A man in his sixties wants to know how to bring up suicide with three friends he's had for 40 years before it's too late.
A 31-year-old in his first long-term relationship doesn't feel anything for the woman he's dating but knows everyone around him likes her. I talk about why the people you see online keeping it together aren't keeping it together. I talk about why the snapshot isn't the whole picture.
I talk about why the first therapist who wants to sell you his book isn't the last therapist you'll need to find. I talk about going right at the hard conversation instead of around it. And I talk about why bringing the government into a relationship you're already unsure about is the wrong move.
Enjoy
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